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Lookupuk.com - England (Adoption Related) Board
Message #40809

Board Name: England (Adoption Related)
Tony Chapman Wigston Magna, Leicestershire Aug 18, 2002
Allow me to say if I may that reading all these messages has rekindled memories of my own search for my birth mother back in 1976, prior to the laws governing adopted children being relaxed.
I was born in 1946 and was 30 years of age when I commenced my search.
To my great amazement I tracked her down within five short weeks. Our first contact was by phone,
a conversation which, in truth, never was, she was unable to speak for crying, we met face to face a week later....they were strange times.
For eighteen years thereafter, my 'mother' and her husband became regular visitors to our house, my kids of course being her grandchildren.
In 1993 she contracted cancer, we saw little of them that year, neither were we allowed to visit them, they had a daughter who had no knowledge of me, my 'mother' wished it to remain that way.
Towards the end of January 1994 her end was near, her husband could keep me secret no longer, he wanted her children with her at the end.
In early February, her husband rang me, telling me that there was someone with him who wished to speak to me. Within seconds I was in conversation with yet another sister about whom I knew nothing......she too, as my 'mother' all those years before being barely able to speak.
Some two days later, we three children met up for the first time, my little sister aged 40, my big sister aged 49 and me aged 48..all of us being of different fathers.
Our mother was overwhelmed when she saw us all at her bedside some two days prior to her passing..I have little doubt that she died happy having seen all of her children together, albeit for only two days of her 70 years.
My 'mother' was a very special lady, all three of us were with her when she slipped away. Throughout all the eighteen years that I knew her I never once called her mother or mum...neither would she have expected me to......I called her mum for the first and last time when I kissed her goodbye...but then..she could no longer hear me.
May I wish all those searching success in their endeavour......I sincerely hope you find those sought.
If any amongst you would care to write to me I would be delighted to hear from you.
The path along which you have embarked is beset with problems....but don't give up....!!!
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